A eulogy to the darlings of my heart...

We are primates. It is coded into our DNA to protect our young, even from each other. There is a point where we fail, fail to prevent something terrible from happening to them. Those are called freak accidents. We read about them in newspapers. We see detailed versions in the news. We even see them happening to people  we know. But never ever even in our darkest dreams do we imagine something like that happening to us. When they do strike, we do not know how  to react. Do we remain in shock for an extended period of time or do we accept it, cope with it slowly but surely, and move on? I do not know. I do not have any answers, because it struck me with a lightning blow when I least expected it.

I write this for the three brothers I lost today. They became victims of a drowning accident earlier this morning. I don’t really know what happened other than what I read in the news. I didn’t have the heart to grill my mother for more information when she called, I was in shock. I think I still am. My brain hasn’t quite grasped the fact that I wouldn’t be seeing any of them ever again, that I wouldn’t see a smile, or get a sweaty bear hug or a pull on my hair ever again from them. I considered going home for the funerals, to be with my family in this extremely trying time, but I couldn’t stand the thought of seeing their faces devoid of life. These were my little brothers, ones I've held as babies,ones I grew up with,ones I played cricket with on holidays…

One of them was dearer to me than the others. He was my mother’s brother’s son, a boy born into the family after us two girls, and after a wait of 8 long years. We spoilt him rotten, all of us. When we were little, we used to joke that when either of us sisters got married, he would be the one greeting the groom and receiving a gold ring as a gift.

They were all happy boys, with a full life ahead of them. It isn’t fair that they left those lives so quickly, not while their parents and grandparents live. No parent should have to bury their child. Yet this day, three pairs of parents in my family are going to have to face  this cruel fate. I am not with them physically, but I hope, my thoughts would provide some manner of comfort to them. With all the love in my heart, I bid my brothers goodbye. Be at peace, little ones…We love you more than words could say…

Part 3:- The story of Legolas and Belegwen

Part 3:- The story of Legolas and Belegwen

Lady Eowyn, the White Lady of Ithilien was very glad to receive the Princess that night. She hadn't seen her in long, and the girl was always a delight to be around. When Elboron and Belegwen arrived, Eowyn met them in the doorway and ushered them in.

"Welcome Belegwen. It has been long since I had the pleasure of seeing your fine face. Come, my child, let me look at you. For all the roaming around that you do, you seem none the worse. My Lord Faramir would be pleased to see you tonight".

"My Lady Eowyn, I thank you for having me here. I hope I haven't caused any inconvenience", said Belegwen.

"My child, how many times have I told you? Call me Eowyn. 'My lady' makes me feel eons old".

At this, Faramir walked into the room. Belegwen bowed her head and greeted him. Faramir walked up to her, lifted her head and said. "Daughters need not bow to their fathers", and kissed her forehead. "I do have something for you. I meant to give it to you today at Minas Tirith,but by the time I had reached, you were halfway here". With this, he took a thick black book from under his cloak and handed it to her.

 "What is it, Faramir?" asked Belegwen.

 "Haven't you often said that you would rather read than hear all that passed along the War of the Ring? This, I had copied from Master Gamgee so that you might have the pleasure", replied Faramir.

"That is very kind of you. Thank you ever so much" and she hugged him.

After the pleasantries and a sumptuous dinner, Belegwen retired to her chamber with the book. She started reading it and didn't know when she fell asleep. Through her half open window, moonlight slithered in and lightened the room. In the silver halo, she seemed ethereal and angelic. This was how Legolas found her.

Ever since Elboron and Belegwen had left, Legolas had been feeling restless. He couldn't put a finger on it. Not in his almost 3000 years of existence had a face haunted him thus. Her eyes, in which reflected wisdom beyond her years, her hair that kept rippling about her face, her bearing, ever so elegant and erect, he could recall everything about her in great detail. His heart yearned to see her once again. Legolas stopped himself as he came into view of the Castle of Emyn Arnen, the ancestral home of the Stewards of Gondor. He hadn't realised that he had started walking, nor how fast his legs had carried him down from the mountain.

The lights were almost out in the castle. His keen elf-eyes saw the flame of a candle burning in a room on the second storey on the east side of the building. He knew that it was the guest wing of the castle, and was probably occupied by Belegwen. He noted that the rocks on the side wall had no crevices for footholds, but that was not likely to hinder his elf feet. He climbed lightly up through the stones and reached the window. At that very moment, a breeze blew the candle out. He paused for a second, listening for movement within. There was none. The window was half open. He opened it wide and stepped into the room. The room was bathed in moonlight. And there she lay, with a book in one hand, with the silver light around her face like a halo. Legolas had to stop a moment and draw breath, for she literally took his breath away. He stood there, transfixed, just watching her sleep. Then he inched closer to her bed and kneeled by her side. He raised his hand and caressed her hair, her brow, her cheek. "If it is my lot, to die of a broken heart, then so be it", he said aloud to himself. She sighed in her sleep and fidgeted. He withdrew his hand and moved back towards the window. He turned around and with one last look at her, jumped out of the window and ran back up into the forests of Ithilien.

Belegwen woke up with a start. She could have sworn that there was somebody else in the room. But there was no one around. It must have been a dream, she thought. And slipped off to sleep soon afterwards.

End of part three.

P.S:- This is getting to be much longer than I anticipated. In trying to control the cheesiness and the language thing, I'm starting to feel like I shouldn't have started at all. lol !!!

Part 2:- the story of Legolas and Belegwen

Part 2:- the story of Legolas and Belegwen

Elboron at once guessed what he must be thinking. He cut in, "Legolas, my friend, do not be surprised at her command of your tongue. She is Aielen, the daughter of Evenstar, and of your dear friend, our noble King."

Legolas nodded. Now, that explains it. Her name was a question in his mind too, it meant 'strong maiden' in elvish. Only parents acquainted with the ancient tongue would have named a daughter thus. So this is the daughter of Aragorn and Arwen Undomiel. Her appearance  seemed to him as a testament to the fact that he hasn't been to meet his dear friend in many years. The last time he had been to Minas Tirith, she wasn't even born. Suddenly Legolas felt old, older than the oak trees surrounding them, which was quite fitting since he had seen many an acorn reach a ruinous age. 

As they made their way further into the clearing, Belegwen realized that what she had thought of as a meadow through the trees was actually an array of shrubs that bound an orchard of Mellyrn trees. There were platforms high upon the trees as the elves favoured.  She hadn't realised how high up on the mountain they had climbed, for the orchard sat upon a cliff, overlooking the clear waters of Anduin. A soothing music was reverberating through the glittering lights above. Although it was not yet midday, it seemed like night time. The air was calm and a cool breeze washed over them. They seemed to have stepped into an earlier era, an age when time stood still. It seemed altogether other-worldly to Belegwen. Her mother would have told her that it was the very image of the orchard where her parents had met almost a century ago. 

She noticed that the elves around them seemed different from the only other ones she had met, her mother and her uncles Elladan and Elrohir. They seemed more antiquated, earthy even and perhaps a little less civilised. But she couldn't dispute that they were a jolly folk. There was much laughter and lighthearted conversation about. There were perhaps fifty of them, but it seemed like much more. She turned around to ask Legolas a question and found him watching her intently. She thought she detected a note of sadness in his eyes. But it was gone the next moment, and a mask of merriment descended. 

Suddenly was heard a horn from the path whence they had come. It was the horn call of Gondor. It had to be on account of Elboron. "I wonder what it is, Father wouldn't summon me unless it was urgent. I should go and see what it is about", said Elboron. He looked around at Belegwen and saw that she was enchanted by the elven colony much as he was when he first set eyes on it.  He asked Legolas, "Would it be appropriate if I left for a little while? I will be back before sundown for her." Legolas nodded. "She will be safe here, as she would be nowhere else", said he. Elboron left  down the hill.

"Lady Belegwen, shall I have the pleasure of showing you around our small settlement?" enquired Legolas.

"Why, of course. What are these tree-platforms called?", asked Belegwen.

"They are called 'Talan'. We, are wood elves. We prefer to sleep in trees unlike our kin of the North. Would you like to climb up to one?" 

"I thought you would never ask", replied Belegwen.

Legolas climbed upon a Mellyrn right at the edge of the cliff with the utmost ease. Then he set down a ladder of Hithlain for her to climb upon. It looked sturdy despite it's lightness. As she climbed up, Belegwen felt as if she had left the earth, never to return. The tree was far taller than she had thought. When she reached the pinnacle where the Talan was set, she could see for miles on all sides, save one.  The view was breathtaking. "This cannot be real, such a world could exist only in stories", exclaimed she. "This is my world", said Legolas. 

As they were sitting there looking beyond, Belegwen studied Legolas' profile carefully. She knew he must me at least as old as her mother, but it seemed as if age had flown by him without leaving any marks. He could  pass for someone Elboron's age, if you discounted the elven ears and the unusual eyes. She wondered how it felt to standby and let millennia pass, seeing birth and death and pain and love, yet know that none of those would leave a mark on oneself. She wondered if he ever felt old, if he ever looked at a man and thought, 'What a child!'

It was almost twilight. The reddish sun was turning the green waters of Anduin into golden snakes. Suddenly Legolas tensed up, and then relaxed again. "I believe Elboron is here to escort you back. We should go down". They climbed down the tree just in time to see Elboron panting up the hill. "You are right on time, my friend. It is just before sundown", said Legolas. "Yes, indeed. I would never hear the end of it, if I lost the Princess in the woods. Her father and mine would quite gladly wring my neck". 

"My Lady, Aielen, I know your heart protests, but it is time we left. It is of course, not prudent for you to ride to Minas Tirith at this hour. I have sent word to your father that you shall rest at Amyn Arnen today",  said Elboron.

"Yes, of course. Namaarie, Legolas. Saesa omentien le. (Farewell Legolas. It was a pleasure meeting you.)".

"My Lady, Belegwen, seasa amin (my pleasure). Namaarie", said Legolas with a bow.

With that Elboron and Belegwen set off down the hill leaving Legolas in his home.

End of part two.

LoTR spinoff- The story of Legolas and Belegwen

A couple of days ago, I was reading Lord of the Rings (again), and watching the movies of the same(again). I had a thought, why doesn't Legolas  have a love connection? This thought, forced in no small part by the fact that Orlando Bloom is phenomenally hot, led me to make up a small love story for him. I hope Tolkien's spirit forgives me.

This is Part 1:- The story of Legolas and Belegwen

So, it has been almost 25 years since the War of the Ring and since Bilbo ,Gandalf and most of the elves have migrated to the Undying lands. Aragorn, or King Elessar as he was known, is the Great King of the West (of Arnor and Gondor and all the lands of men except Rohan). He has three children with Arwen, Eldarion, Elanor and Belegwen. The youngest,Belegwen is the heroine of our story. 

She is a maiden of almost 18 , as fair as her mother and as courageous as her father. Her feats with her sword is renowned far and wide, and has passed into legend.  She is sometimes called, Aielen, or little star. Her best friend is Elboron, the son of Faramir, the Prince of Ithilien and Lord of Emyn Arnen and Lady Eowyn of Rohan. He is four years older than her and she has followed him about ever since she was a little girl. She is closer to him than to her siblings. She also has a special relationship with Elboron's father, due to their mutual love of lore and music. She loves and respects him like she does her own father. 

One day, when Elboron was in Ithilien, she decided to go visit him without any chaperones. By mere chance, Faramir who was standing outside the great Hall looking about, saw this and sent forth 4 of his most trusted soldiers to accompany her. If she was annoyed by this, she didn't let it on her face. When she reached Ithilien, Elboron was waiting for her at the door of the Citadel. They set off together towards the forests of Ithilien. He said, "There is someone I want you to meet. He was a great friend of your father, and now of mine. He resides here in the forest, with his kin." She nodded. The paths in the forest looked too beautiful to be trodden on. There were little purple flowers and green leaves strewn all around. The rays of the midday sun was pouring in small drops through the foliage. Suddenly they came into a clearing in the woods. It was outlined by huge oak trees with intertwining roots. Ten of them stood erect in all grandeur. There was a little gushing spring on one side, with sparkling, cold, clear water. Through the opening in the trees beyond, there could be seen a meadow, with little yellow and purple flowers dancing in the breeze. "Such a fair sight, I have never seen in all my waking years", said Belegwen. She reached out to touch the bark of the oak nearest to her and then, out sprang a form, tall and willowy, with blue eyes and a fair face, his fair hair glistening in the sun. Clad in woodland green and brown, with a long bow in hand and a quiver on his back, thus sprung forth, Legolas Greenleaf. 

"Elboron, my friend, well met as usual. You brought a friend, I see." said Legolas and put his arm around Elboron's shoulders in elven embrace.

 "Mae Govannen Legolas. This is my friend, Belegwen. " said Elboron. 

(Well met, Legolas).

"Your elvish is certainly improving my friend." Then Legolas turned to address Belegwen. "My Lady...." Legolas felt like his breath was knocked out. It isn't everyday that an elf feels that way, for they are hindered by almost nothing. He felt as if he couldn't look at her directly for long, it was like looking at the bright afternoon sun, yet he couldn't look away. Her eyes, so dark in such a fair face was looking at him in question, one eyebrow raised. He hadn't missed the slight movement of her hand towards the sword in her belt when he had leapt out of the tree. He realised that he was staring at her and stepped back to steady himself. In the traditional elvish courtesy, he brought his right hand to his left breast and bowed his head. "Mae govannen Belegwen. A friend of Elboron is always welcome here, in our realm in the Forests of Ithilien." 

"Hannon le. Ta sai vanima sinome (It is very beautiful here). I hear you have been instrumental in restoring these to their former glory. " said Belegwen. 

Legolas bowed his head in acknowledgement. It is then that he realised that she had replied to him in the tongue of his forefathers. She was far too young to have known it. His eyes widened in surprise, he looked at her face again. Surely, there was one as fair as her, who walked the elven realm in Imladris once? The Evenstar of his people, who forsook her immortality for love...The resemblance was too strong to be a mere coincidence. Who was she, who walked into his life like the summer rain that doesn't darken the sky, but sprays an earthy fragrance all around? Who was this fair maiden whose posture was strong and womanly at once? Who indeed was she.....

End of part one.

PS:- If this sounds a bit like Mills and Boons stories, I assure you it was not my intent. Early twentieth century prose, is just not my strong subject ;) Also, the names of Aragorn's daughters are not mentioned by Tolkien anywhere, so they are of my own making.

Of God and Religion

Most people around me are atheists. I suppose the whole science against religion perception accounts for that. Me, well, I am somewhere in the middle. While I am not a huge fan of organized religion, I do believe in the existence of a being more superior than I am. At the peril of quoting Dan Brown, I have to say that it is science that has taught me to believe in God. The vastness and variety of the Cosmos I study compels me to trust in an entity who is omnipotent. God,Nature,Universe, whatever the name, I believe there is a being that is the embodiment of the First Law of Thermodynamics that form the basis of our understanding of existence.

 I have always maintained that it is very difficult to grow up in India and not believe in God. We love our Gods like they are members of our family. Indeed, the 3 Million something Hindu Gods and their different incarnations and forms, Jesus and his various disciples(read Saints), Allah and his prophets,the countless tribal Gods ...all in all, we have about 5 Million Gods ruling a population of 1.2 billion, which is quite fitting I think. It gives you the same feeling you get when you dab yourself all over with a new perfume, like you are cocooned safely inside a cloud with all these people watching over you. 

Then there are personal-family Gods, who protect their respective family. This concept is mostly derelict nowadays. They reside in the attic and are worshipped by an eternal flame (in most homes). I myself have only heard about this custom in stories my maternal Grandmother used to narrate when I was a child. The most interesting of these was connected to how my ancestors came to Kerala and set up a  temple for our family God almost 100 kms from my hometown. Apparently my great great great great (and a couple greats more) Grandfather was about to flee from his village in Naanjinaadu (in Nagerkoil district of today's Tamilnadu) for some reason I can't remember now, he heard a majestic voice from the attic that said “I'm also coming”. The owner of that voice was the Goddess who resided in the attic. So he took the effigy along with him to Kerala and set up  a temple for her in Mannadi in Pathanamthitta district of Kerala. This temple later became famous as the one Veluthampi Dalawa hid to escape the British and subsequently committed suicide in. Unfortunately none of this can be authenticated for my source has long since passed away and no one else in my family remembers these stories.

I believe growing up listening to mythological stories from my Grandparents has had a profound influence in my spirituality. My grandmother was an ardent devotee of several Hindu Gods and an avid reader. My Grandfather is a Communist who regularly visits temples, an oxymoron in himself. Sometimes I feel a certain disbelief in the whole concept, but it passes after a while and I'm back in my non-religious but God-believer Avatar.